Final Fantasy 15’s weirdest boss battles aren’t in the game itself (update)

In the lead-up to Final Fantasy 15’s long-awaited release, Square Enix held a special livestream for Japanese fans filled with gameplay and goofs — lots and lots of goofs. The archive above, which features some fanmade English-language subtitles by user dominationkid w., gives fans a special look at an exclusive version of the game that will never make it past the confines of this pre-release event.

Square Enix prepared the Final Fantasy 15 “Mystery Disc” just for the stream, and by the looks of it, that’s a total shame. The content seen above is pretty wild, even by the standards of a game where precious Moogle dolls are used as demon bait. Between a fight against an oversized baby and a battle with Square Enix CEO Yosuke Matsuda, the Mystery Disc looks like a good time in its own right.

Seriously: The first mission in the stream consists of Noctis’ pal Prompto, who was a serious snacker in his youth, devolving into a super-sized version of his kiddy self after one too many chips. It’s up to Noctis to take his big best buddy down and get him to hand over the bag.

Later on comes Noctis’ one-on-one with Matsuda, who comes ready with his own frightening sword and some steely resolve. Apparently he was the mastermind behind the weirdness in the rest of the demo, he tells Noctis after their quick bout.

“In order to entertain everyone who joined this event, I planned all these that happened today,” Matsuda says after the boss fight. “Let’s get ready for release!”

It’s all very self-aware and meta and strange, especially when Notcis and pals thank the viewers for tuning in for the release day eve party. As odd as this all is, it’s nice to see that Square Enix still has a sense of humor about this major release. After 10 years of wishing and waiting for Final Fantasy 15, fans can certainly appreciate some levity. It’s just too bad that we probably won’t ever get to play these weirdo missions for ourselves.

Based on our review, the full game isn’t lacking in some serious strangeness itself. Check that out for more before picking up Final Fantasy 15, out now on PlayStation 4 and Xbox One.

Update: The battle against Square Enix CEO Yosuke Matsuda will be offered as downloadable content, Games Talk reports. The CEO himself confirmed on a Famitsu livestream that players will be able to check out the bizarre fight at a later date. There’s still no word on whether the battle with childhood Prompto will come to the game, however.